Diet: Cutting down from twelve to eleven chocolate gateaux per day.
Recipe: A formula to ensure that chocolate is included in everything from baked potatoes to onion soup.
Self Control: Saving half your box of chocolates until 'later'.
Ultimate Act of Generosity: Grudgingly giving someone a square of your precious chocolate.
Love: A passionate need for another. Many believe that true love is only possible with one chocolate bar at a time.
Unrequited Love: When your chocolate cake just doesn't seem to care about you any more.
Aphrodisiac: Chocolate covered oysters served with chocolate flavoured champagne.
Chocophobia: The totally logical fear that the world will run out of chocolate.
Glutton: Anyone who refuses to share with you.
Affair: Having a wonderful time with one chocolate ice cream while another is patiently waiting in the fridge.
Sex Appeal: Being so 'hot' that you cause chocolate to melt at first glance.
© Stuart Macfarlane
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